Spotlight: Rabbi Juan Mejia and the Bnai Anusim

The first podcast from Be'chol Lashon focuses on Anusim, Jews who were forced to abandon Judaism against their will, but now are trying to do whatever is in their power to return to Judaism.

In this podcast, Rabbi Juan Mejia argues that some of the was Anusim are currently treated in the Jewish community are very similar to the way Jews were treated during the Spanish Inquisition by Inquisitors and he talks about how he's working to change that.

Be'chol Lashon has an interesting, if sometimes controversial, view of the Jewish community. For more information, watch: "A Global Jewish Community".

You can reach Rabbi Mejia through his website: http://www.koltuvsefarad.com/.

Black in Israel

In an LA Times story, "Ethiopian Israeli filmmaker pulls no punches" as he discusses Zrubavel, a film that looks at the Ethiopian Jewish experience in Israel.

And in other news: "'What does it matter that we're black?' ask Ethiopian students" (Haaretz)

"Rabbi Amar: Can't compromise in Ethiopian students affair" (YNET)

UPDATE 9/1/09: "Schools to accept Ethiopian students".

The World According to Your Uterus

Here's an update on "My Uterus is None of Your Business". (See above photo: I knew I forgot to do something this summer!)

While I was away the world in Riverdale shifted. And now, all the people I know now fall into these categories:

Trying to get pregnant.

Pregnant.

Just popped.

And honestly, that would be fine if those of us who did not fit into these categories weren't treated as if we had absolutely nothing to say of any great import and weren't being reminded at every turn that "we just don't know what it's like because we don't have any children" and other condescending coos.

SIGH.

Someone get me out of Riverdale...fast!

My Latest Piece

Check out: "How a Workaholic Control Freak Learned to Relax: Adventures in Shabbat"

Hair Memory

That's me at the bottom with my two or three feet of hair.

In high school, a guy came up to me in the lunch room to ask me out. And then right in the middle of doing so, he stopped and stared at my hair.

"Your hair kinda reminds me of pubes," he said.

There was a pause.

"Did you just call my hair...pubic hair?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said sheepishly.

"Oh."

Needless to say, we never went out.

What are you?

A new documentary by Carolyn Battle Cochrane tells it like it is with a kick-ass title, "I'm Biracial, Not Black Dammit!"

WANTED! Participants in video shoot of part two of "Biracial...Not Black Damn It." If you are in New York on Sept 7th and are biracial/multiracial or mixed and want to participate in a segment for the documentary, please contact Carolyn Battle Cochrane on Facebook, or email her at conversations17 AT aol.com.

Venezuelan Jews Flee to Miami

According to family lore, before some of ancestors became Dominican, they were Venezuelan. The reasons why the Venezuelan part of our family hopped over to the Dominican Republic have been lost in family history. Who knows why people pick up and leave the country of their birth? Well, it's no secret why Jews are leaving Venezuela in droves.

Read: "Venezuelan Jews no longer feel safe" (Miami Herald)

How do I show my children they can be biracial and Jewish?

From a prospective convert whose “father is Jewish and mother won’t admit she is.” Can you say…complicated? But she’s less concerned for herself than her biracial children.

My oldest son is under the impression that being light-skinned is the norm for the Jewish community and he is having difficulty wanting to be Jewish (although he knows that Judaism is not a race or nationality).

I was just wondering if anybody has a suggestion for ways to show him that Jews come in all colors.

---Converting in Pennsylvania

How do we teach Jewish children (and almost-Jewish children) a concept that even Jewish adults have trouble wrapping their head around?

I suggested reaching out to organizations like Be'chol Lashon and the Jewish Multiracial Network, which has a great list-serv that connects Jews of color of all ages and white parents of Jews of color.

Also, I suggested getting a copy of "I Love Jewish Faces," a children's book by Debra Darvick, which is now available for pre-order. I've already ordered two copies of this book, which hopes to highlight the diversity of the Jewish community.

What would you suggest?

The Go Green Mitzvah?

Parshat Ki Teitzei from G-dcast.com

More Torah cartoons at www.g-dcast.com

© 20

A Broader Definition of Family

My mother used to slap us if we spoke slang. And while she never sat down to help us with our homework, as far as I can remember, she would slap us, too, if we didn’t get it done. Acting ghetto and talking ghetto alike were a big no-no in our household. My mother thought the ghetto was toxic, a poison she feared would trap her kids if we started acting like the kids we saw at all hours of the night on street corners.

While dealing with abuse at home and being bullied by classmates in school, there was one thing that couldn’t be taken away from me. I was smart. I loved books. And the more I read, the better I did in school and the more my classmates picked on me. Intermittently, my mother, who expected us all to get good grades and go to college, would pull me out of school to take care of my siblings claiming that my grades were good enough that missing one or two days wasn’t going to affect my grade point average.

I was a fatherless child among many fatherless children in inner-city New York. I had to look for father figures where I could get them. My mother never brought men home. I didn’t even know she had a boyfriend until she told me she was pregnant again when I was about to turn 15. Of course, I was unwittingly, unconsciously looking for father figures and I was very lucky. Every once in a while, father figures would come prepackaged and delivered to me on the first day of school in the form of teachers.

When I became a teacher, I told people I was following in the footsteps of my fathers. My teacher fathers. I would not have survived without these men. Most of them were young. They didn’t have kids of their own. I don’t think they completely understood that they were acting as substitute fathers or maybe they did and they understood that this was an unsaid part of being a New York City public school teacher. These men nurtured my writing, helped me with my homework, my college essays, my scholarship applications, helped me find jobs, gave me money so I had enough to eat. And for moments at a time, they made me feel safe, even in a world where I knew I wasn’t.

I’ve just started reading “What Else But Home: Seven Boys and an American Journey Between the Projects to the Penthouse" by Michael Rosen. The book is about an upper middle class Jewish couple and how their lives were changed by, and how they changed the lives of, five poor African-American and Latino boys by making them part of their family.

In an interview with Tablet Magazine", Rosen says, “I’m fascinated by love—you can hate in large numbers, like in the Holocaust, but love seems to have to exist in small numbers.” Not in his household.

What a Lucky Girl

The memoir, Lucky Girl is about one woman's surprise reunion and relationship with the complicated Chinese family that gave her up for adoption when she was a baby. Spanning cultures and continents, Mei-Ling Hopgood's memoir brings home a tale of joy and regret, hilarity, deep sadness, and great discovery, as she untangles the unlikely strands that formed her destiny.

In "Another Country, not my Own", Mei-Ling Hopgood wrestles with the tensions that can arise when adoptive parents embrace the "home" cultures of their children.

The stories of adoptive parents and their children always make me very emotional. Growing up, my sisters and I dreamed that we would be adopted someday, that beautiful, wonderful parents would rescue us from the misery of child abuse and neglectful parents. They never came. It is a truly amazing person, an angel, that has the compassion to take the children of others and raises them as their own.

The Choosing America Project

The Choosing America Project is looking for true short stories that express the very essence of being an immigrant in America. We are interested in is eliciting gripping human interest short stories that will reflect the diversity of the American immigrant experience, past and present.

The final goal of The Choosing America Project is to create a series of short films directed by a variety of directors who will choose from the pool of stories we are now collecting.

For more details please go to our website http://www.choosingamerica.com/.

By turning to established writers we hope to increase the likelihood of eliciting high quality material. However we are open to all. So if you know of someone - writers, students, professors, educators, seniors, colleagues, friends - who you think has a story that would be suitable for Choosing America, please feel free to pass on this material.

Thanks for spreading the word!

Lia Friesem

The Choosing America Project

http://www.choosingamerica.com/

lia@choosingamerica.com

stories@choosingamerica.com


More about "The Choosing America Project"...

America is a nation of immigrants. Albert Einstein, Alexander Graham Bell, Henry Kissinger, Mikhail Baryshnikov, Greta Garbo, Martina Navratilova, Hans Bethe, Madeleine Albright, Gloria Estefan, Michael J. Fox ,Arnold Schwarzenegger, Carlos Santana, Sammy Sosa, Hakeem Olajuwon.

None of them was born in America. All chose America. Like you.

Whether you're from Germany, England, Italy or the Czech Republic, Mexico, Nigeria, Pakistan, China, or Cuba, whether you immigrated to America as a child, a young adult, or with your own children, whether it was your decision or your parents', whether you immigrated in the 20's, 50s' the 80s' or just yesterday, you must have one special story to tell. And we want to hear it!

The Choosing America Project

We are looking for authentic dramatic anecdotes, short stories (1500-4000 words) that epitomize your experience as immigrants who CHOSE to live in America.

Think of something that has happened to you as an immigrant - We are looking for those special moments, encounters, surprises, experiences, disappointments, which vividly convey what it's like to be an immigrant in America. The good, the bad, the sad, the miraculous, the joyful— every anecdote is welcome as long as it's authentic and well told.

IF YOU HAVE A GOOD STORY – WE WANT TO HEAR IT!

The goal of our project is to turn some of these stories into short films that will be shown in the movies and broadcast on TV.

So think carefully of that special story that is worth telling the world, and share it with us.

Send your story to: stories@choosingamerica.com

We'll be glad to answer any further questions you might have.

For more details go to: http://www.choosingamerica.com/

Getting with it Blogging

If you’re as observant as I am, you probably haven’t noticed the changes I’ve made to the blog. I went into someone’s house the other day and for 15 minutes, they had me look around and “Guess what’s different!” I never did. For a writer, my attention to detail is really quite awful.

So, what’s new?

Donate Button

I added a “Donate” button to the top of my blog. A fellow blogger, Esther Kustanowitz asked if it was tacky to add one to hers and I said, “Who cares if it’s tacky! I’m doing it!” She later wrote a fascinating blog on it, "How to Save Blogging: Clap Your Hands, Leave a Comment, Tip the Jar"

Very quickly after posting the “Donate” button, I got my first donation. It was the best $10 I’ve ever made. Yeah, if I got paid $1 for every visitor to my blog, I wouldn’t have to start considering going on social security disability. No, I don’t blog (or write) for the money. (If I did, I’d get very hungry.) But if you want to buy me a "cup of coffee," I'll be properly grateful.

Subscribe via email Feature

I’m horrible at reading blogs because I’m too lazy to check the blogs periodically. I’m also too lazy to hit “Favorites” on my Internet Explorer browser where I’ve saved all the blogs I would be reading if I wasn’t lately. I kept seeing “Subscribe to Email” on different people’s blogs and I thought, “That’s ingenious!” And so I’ve finally added this feature to my blog right under my photo.

New Link List: Introduction to Judaism

I’m starting to realize that a good amount of my readers are people who are just becoming addicted to Judaism. For these folks, I added a list of cool websites to surf to the blog. Yes, one reader is right when she said, “Trying to learn to be Jewish off Internet is like trying to diagnose yourself using Web MD” but it’s a great place to start!

Letters from you!

At the bottom of the blog, there’s a link to my email. I love receiving letters from you! You write great letters! Keep them coming. You keep me motivated to keep on writing. And now, with your permission, I’m taking some of your great letters and sharing them with my readers as blog posts. It’s my little way of creating community one blog at a time. By the way, if you have two seconds, become a fan.

Support Group

Whether you're thinking about pursuing an Orthodox conversion, already in the process or you converted years ago, check out the link to my support group, OrthodoxConversionNYC. We're not just New Yorkers. The group is open to everyone, male or female, all over the world looking to receive or provide support to other people who have made or are making similar life changes.

The Internal and External Pressures of Conversion

Recently, I met someone who is interested, toying with, the possibility of conversion to Judaism. But the first meeting with the rabbi went steadily south. In fact, that's an understatement. It was downright awful. The rabbi even made some racist comments. Whoa.

But despite one rude rabbi, this person's interest in Judaism was not deterred. And this is something I find pretty impressive, no matter how many times I hear this story. Most sincere converts keep coming back to Judaism no matter how many obstacles come their way. It's a testament to the tenacity of converts how often this happens.

Though I've heard this story countless times, each time, I've wondered about how many prospective converts have heard that rabbis turn converts away at least three times to test their sincerity. (Some people in the community take this so seriously, they decide to do the rabbi's job for him by making a prospective convert's life as miserable as possible.)

But honestly, conversion is hard no matter how difficult the rabbis make it. In this week's "Question of the Week," Chabad went that extra mile and got very deep about answering, "Why do Rabbis Discourage Conversions?"

First runner up: Miss Dominican Republic

Miss Dominican Republic Ada Aimee De La Cruz was first runner up in the Miss Universe 2009 contest.

What's Jewish food?

Lately, I’ve been hearing a lot about “Jewish food.” The phrase seems to be on the tip of everyone’s tongue. The phrase troubles me because when people talk about “Jewish food,” I've noticed they seem to only be talking about Ashkenazi (Eastern European) food.

So you can imagine my distress when I stumbled upon ”A Jewish Food Cheat Sheet” and realized that there was only one Sephardic Jewish dish on the whole list. Shawarma didn’t even make the list. One friend called the list "a very narrow conceptualization of a much more varied people/nation."

When I asked a Ashkenazi Jewish friend about this phenomena of equating "Jewish food" with only "Eastern European food," he said, "I think that it is a symptom of a much more widespread phenomenon...where Eastern European everything is considered 'the Jewish way'...even in halacha (Jewish law), minhagim (customs), prayers...."

He added, "Although, I would not speak about its as though it's the worst thing in the world, it does hurt and it makes people doubt their own narratives and backgrounds, which is not good...causing ever greater homogenization in Jewish life."

So here's a short list of some other foods that should have made this list. Can you think of any others? I'm already thinking of Carciofi alla Giudia, those delicious Roman Jewish artichokes I tasted in Italy.

And how do we get plantains added to the Sephardic Jewish palate?

Leaving Los Angeles

For the second year in a row, my husband and I spent our summer in Los Angeles. Again, my husband was playing the role of rabbinic intern at a local Orthodox congregation, Bnai David Judea, where he, in fact, had his bar mitzvah. And while he was off learning to be a rabbi, everyone wondered I would be doing, everyone, including me.

For the first half of the summer, I took classes at Santa Monica College. I cannot stress the wonderfulness and cost effectiveness of their Continuing Education programs. For the cost of one very pricey writing class in New York, I took THREE six-week classes: one in Memoir Writing with Monona Wali, one in Figure Drawing and another in Stand-up Comedy with Kevin Garbee. 

I had taken the first two classes (Memoir Writing and Figure Drawing) before and health and family functions got in the way of steady attendance this summer. But as you may have read on previous blogs, I thoroughly enjoyed coming up with stand-up comedy routines. I wrote more routines this summer than I did chapters on my book. 

At some point during the summer, I started receiving emails from people in the Los Angeles area, blog readers, who were interested in meeting me in person to discuss their own personal Jewish journeys and how I could offer them support. Suddenly, I was thrust in the role of would-be Rebbetzin (rabbi’s wife) and very quickly, it seemed like I was coming to synagogue with a new person every other week. And all the while, these new people apologized for coming to me for advice and support, I was thankful for them.

For a very long time after being diagnosed with fibromyalgia, I felt lost until I discovered writing again. And writing has led to so many unexpected opportunities, including this new one of acting as a “Jewish guide.” Helping people find their way Jewishly has made me feel more than helpful, it has given me renewed purpose and made me feel more useful than I’ve felt in a long time. Where fibromyalgia has made me feel useless and disconnected, these encounters have left me feeling incredibly valuable and useful.

I was sorry to leave Los Angeles for a slew of reasons. In Los Angeles, I truly felt a part of a community. The people at Bnai David Judea were, as always, incredibly warm and welcoming. We were invited out just about every Shabbat and when we weren’t, we had people over to our home. We attended two beautiful outdoor wedding ceremonies here. We met converts from all walks of life (from Texas to El Salvador). I think I now know more people in Los Angeles than I know in all of Riverdale.

I also had the great pleasure of listening to Rabbi (and blogger) Yosef Kanesfky discuss practical halakha (Can you use a timer for your coffee maker on Shabbat?) and women’s issues (Can women carry the Torah?). And though I missed the Sunday Limmud LA conference because of a fibromyalgia flare-up, I did enjoy a “Taste of Limmud” on one weekday evening. I (almost) learned one-on-one with the wonderful Rebbetzin Chana Heller at Aish LA. Learning opportunities in Los Angeles were never too far out of reach and mostly, I showed up for them.

I learned to drive! I learned how to curse in Mexican Spanish--don't worry I've already forgotten how! I went to the beach! I drove to the beach! My bones never ached from rain (there wasn’t any!). I never got stuck in that dreaded LA traffic everyone was mentioning at every turn. I appreciated being able to get everywhere I wanted in 15 minutes by car or foot and not having to ride the always physically draining subway for 30-45 minutes to get to civilization.

I learned that a native New Yorker could survive far, far away from the island of Manhattan. Especially in Los Angeles, a place where you can find cheap plantains and cheap kosher food (a $5 not $15 burger!). (Stay tuned for future posts on the kosher eateries of Los Angeles!) Yes, I converted to Judaism and if I could, I’d probably convert to Los Angeles, too!

I just have one of those faces

Just another day around the Shabbat table....

“Wow, you’re so exotic-looking!” the host gushes.

Everyone turns to stare at me. 

“Not really,” I reply casually, trying to contain my eye roll. “There’s a whole island full of people who look like me.”

“Oh, the Dominican Republic?” the host asks knowingly with a laugh. 

“No,” I reply. “Manhattan.”

Letters to the Editor

My response to a piece on Benjamin Cardozo in last week's Jewish Week made it into this week's issue. Check it out: My Letter to the Editor.

Jews in the News: The Latest on Conversion, Jews, Movies and More

Jewish Infighting

"Who will carry the torch for Jewish unity?" (The Jewish Chronicle)

Simon Rock asks, “How can we preserve Jewish peoplehood if we can’t agree who is a Jew?” A very good question! His article gives a good, if long-winded, look at the obstacles that currently impede Jewish unity.

"Racists, Fascists, Self-hating Jews and Other Terms of Endearment" (Chicago Daily Observer)

Jewish infighting has gone public as Israeli newspaper Ha’Aretz reports that Benjamin Netanyahu called Obama advisors David Axelrod and Rahm Emanuel “self-hating Jews.” Oy vey, indeed.

The Jewish Lifecycle

"Women 'step into adulthood' already as adults in Pocono Pines"

Proof again that you're never too old to have a bat mitzvah!

Conversion

"Arrivals: Devorah Olam: From New York state to Ma'aleh Adumim" (Jerusalem Post)

This profile does wonders in illuminating the winding paths many converts take to reach Judaism, from falling out with spouses and relatives to moving from one denomination to the next to finding a home in Israel (the people and the country).

"Declaring bride's conversion treif, Rishon Lezion rabbi nixes marriage" (The Jerusalem Post)

Rishon Lezion Chief Rabbi Yehuda David Wolpe strikes again. He refused to issue a marriage license for a couple living in his city because the bride's conversion - performed under the auspices of the Orthodox Chief Rabbinate of Israel - was deemed to be unkosher.

Jews in the Middle East: Israel & Beyond

"Lebanon Jewish community rebuilds ornate synagogue" (AFP)

Can someone explain how (and why) there are still Jews in Lebanon?

"Jewish Teen on Trial in Iran" (JTA)

Well, this can't go anywhere good. Pray.

"They may say I do but what to do when the state says, no you don't?" (TheAge.com)

When the groom couldn't prove he was Jewish, this Jewish couple decided to become part of a growing group of Israelis who have married in private ceremonies not recognized by the State of Israel.

Jews in Latin America

"Latin American Jews contend with spike in anti-Semitism" (The Christian Science Monitor)

Across Latin America, Jewish leaders say they are contending with a new level of anti-Semitism that heated up after Israel's military operation in Gaza in December. Um, so I guess I'll cross South America off my list of places to look for jobs for my husband come next summer.

"Argentineans commemorate AMIA attack" (JTA)

Argentina's president attended the annual commemoration of the terrorist attack on the AMIA Jewish community center in Buenos Aires.

Jews in America

"National News" (Baltimore Jewish Times)

A news roundup: DHL is fined for shipping to Iran, Sudan and Syria. Jewish groups laud Sotomayor confirmation. U.S. Army Base goes kosher. Democrats tell Republicans to denounce Limbaugh’s Nazi remarks. Conservative rabbi in Georgia sues over kosher laws--ah, that clarifies a news bit from last week's roundup!

"Is the turbulent health care debate bad for the Jews?" (JTA)

Um, what do Nazis have to do with healthcare? And why turbulent times are not good for minorities....

"Coming Home to Touro: Our Colonial Jewish History" (Jewish Press)

Wondering when Jews came to America? Here's a little lesson in Jewish history for you.

Jews in Europe

"For young Europeans discovering roots, Jewishness is about culture, not religion" (JTA)

Can Jewishness be defined without religion? These young Europeans say it can.

Jews in a Disney World

"Do Disney movies promote anti-Semitism and racism?" (Haaretz)

I know you thought Disney movies were just cute and cuddly but do the stereotypes that abound in Disney movies warp the way we view people from other cultures?

"'it's a small world' and the Jewish Problem" (Haaretz)

A whole different (Jewish) look on that famous Disney ride.

Jews in Music and Movies

"Oy Caramba!" (NY Post)

From “Bagels & Bongos” to “Mazel Tov, Mis Amigos,” Latin-Jewish fusion is alive and well in music and funny (not haha) titles abound!

"David N. Weiss: From Hollywood to Holywood" (Examiner.com)

Who says you can’t get religion in Hollywood? And why does this article seem to imply that a Jew who has left Judaism has to convert to come back?

"Revenge of the Jews, Tarantino Style" (Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles)

Um, is anyone planning on actually SEEING this movie? Please, don't tell me. I really don't want to know. If you have any good sense go see "District 9" instead.

Jews in Books

"Expanding The Limits Of Home" (The Jewish Week)

In “What Else But Home: Seven Boys and an American Journey between the Projects and the Penthouse," Michael Rosen’s seven-year-old son Ripton befriends five of boys—all black and Hispanic, from the impoverished neighborhood across the park— who became a fixture in the Rosens’ home. The boys began to see the Rosens as more than just an arcade of middle-class creature comforts; the Rosens began to learn the full stories of the boys’ fractured lives.

Jews in the Twilight Zone

And in case you missed it, in last week's news, Roseanne Barr dressed up as Hitler but there's no way I'm linking to that despicable Heeb Magazine spread.

Making the News!

Last week, the local paper, The Riverdale Press contacted me for an interview. Somehow, they had stumbled upon my blog. During the really-early-in-the-morning interview, I hoped that I wouldn't embarrass myself too much. Mostly, I didn't. 

Check out: "Blogger chronicles her Catholic past, Jewish present"

New Piece: Inappropriate for the Shabbos Table

Who said adopting a new religion and culture was easy? I sure didn't. Sometimes, it's actually quite embarrassing. And by "it," I mean me!

Check out: "Inappropriate for the Shabbos Table"

And yet another episode of "As the Convert's World Turns"

I was standing in a school cafeteria in Middlebury, Vermont, surrounded by Jews of every flavor, as well as many Israelis with a very "Sephardic" look. And then, someone said something to one of the teachers, a 50-or-60-something-year-old woman who has spent most of her life in Israel.

Repeatedly, I heard her say,"You? A convert? No!"

The teacher then proceeded to pull someone else over and ask, "Who looks more Jewish? Me or her?" All the while, she was pointing at me.

She repeated the words "She looks so much more Jewish than me" about thirty times in Hebrew.

I was mortified. (Yeah, no kidding.)

There is no one Jewish look. There isn't one way to "look" Jewish. The beauty of Judaism is the patchwork fabric of its people.

For more words of wisdom, check out Chaviva's blog or follow her on Twitter.

Stop in the name of pants!

Meanwhile, over at Frum Satire, Heshy gave my blog some love by reposting my stand-up comedy routine on pants: "I Don't Wear Pants Anymore". 

But somehow, the comments thread quickly turned into a conversation about whether or not you can be Orthodox and wear pants. 

Did people miss the jokes or is it possible that stand-up comedy can spark giggles and deep religious/philosophical conversation?

Animated Torah!

Getting me to read the Parsha HaShuva, the weekly Torah portion, usually involves whining. On my part. Let it never be said that my yetzer hara is dead. But I'm working on it.

Thanks to a little help from above, I've discovered "G-dcast." Torah with pictures!!!!!!! Can you hear my excitement?

So yeah, I'm a visual learner. (Almost a fashion illustrator in a former life.) If it wasn't for The Ten Commandments according to Charleton Heston, I might not be Jewish today!

So hooray for animated Torah!



Parshat Shoftim from G-dcast.com

More Torah cartoons at http://www.g-dcast.com/

T-Shirt Shopping

Latina Magazine decided to celebrate Justice Sonia Sotomayor's confirmation by selling 'Wise Latina' t-shirts rebranding Sotomayor's controversial words into an empowering message. Proceeds go to the Bronx Global Learning Institute for Girls.

And everyone's talking about the "Super Jew" T-shirt Seth Rogen donned for the latest Judd Apatow movie, "Funny People." The proceeds won't go anywhere interesting but I'm sure you'll get a wink or two your way.

Hebrew Mamita hits The Jerusalem Post

Vanessa Hidary, the Hebrew Mamita, is touring Israel and of course, she's already been interviewed by The Jerusalem Post in a video where she talks about performing and the reactions she has received from Jewish and non-Jewish audiences alike.

Below is a clip of Hidary telling us a story about a Jewish girl and her first boyfriend, a Dominican guy from Washington Heights. Putting aside the issue of intermarriage for a moment, the video gives you a funny taste of Dominican-American culture in Washington Heights right down to shopping for namebrand clothing in people's apartments (no, seriously).




The second part of the performance takes an interesting turn focusing on everything from interracial dating to the Jew all Latinos everywhere love to watch on Saturdays.

Note: A language advisory on all the videos!

Jew+Country of Origin=Flavorful Jews

Speaking of Spanish and Caribbean Jewish mixes, here are some mixes my friend came up with...

Jewmaicans

Jewbans
Jewricuas (Puerto Rican Jews)
Jewlombians
Jewzuelans
Jewxicans
Jewdoreans
Jewmalans

Jewricans (Costa Rican)

Jewduranians?

Jewlizians (Belize) are privileged because it sounds delicious!

Jewlivians

Jewruvians

Jewdorians

Whew, in the end he said, "I cannot do it with Honduras. Maybe they are no Jews in Honduras."

What other Jew-mixes have you heard of?

Sighting: The Black Jew

Walking down the street in Los Angeles, a little blond seven-year-old Jewish girl sees a black Orthodox Jewish man in a black suit, black hat, white shirt and tzitzit flying in the wind.

“Wow, that’s weird,” she says to her mother.

Her white Jewish mother holds her breath waiting for the next statement.

“Did you see that, Mom?" she says tugging on her mother's sleeve. "That rabbi’s wearing an IPOD!”

Dear Aliza: It's Easier Being Black in Israel. NOT!

I get such great letters from readers and I'm going to try to post more of them up here. Here's a good one!

Dear Aliza,

A good friend of mine recently sent me a link to “Funny, You Don’t Look Jewish” and it blew my mind. It stirred up feelings in me that I haven't felt in a long time, and I felt like I could have written most of the article myself. 

I'm black, and black American Jews are not so common in Israel (or anywhere?). I'm first-generation American in my family, like you. And like you, I grew up as a not-so-religious Catholic in a place heavily populated with religious Jews - Teaneck, NJ. I converted about 4 years ago. I now live in Israel with my husband and kids.

It's hard, sometimes, sticking out so much. We recently moved to a small yishuv, and people have to get used to the sight of me (and my kids). It takes a while, and can be really frustrating. It makes me ashamed that I'm a convert sometimes, which is sad.

I've had people come up and ask me, "Are you Jewish? Where are you from, who are you??" (Don’t these people know that is assur-forbidden!)

The last time someone asked me if I was Jewish, I said “I was born Jewish,” which, in my mind, is sort of true, since I was reborn in the mikveh (ritual bath). I was just fed up. It was a Rebbetzin (rabbi’s wife) who asked!

----Anonymous in Israel

IN SEARCH OF RICE AND BEANS!

I’m moving to Florida. Right now.

Okay, I’m joking but I’m wondering if instead of visiting my family down in the Dominican Republic this year, I should make the trek out to North Miami Beach where I have uncovered a Latin kosher restaurant, Mami's Kosher Restaurant, that serves Cuban food. Rice! Beans! Tostones! Jackpot!

My mouth is watering as I dream of visiting Mami's Kosher restaurant.

And seriously, how come there is only ONE kosher Mexican food in New York? And absolutely none in Los Angeles. Not that Mexican food is anything like Dominican food. If someone else tries to push a quesadilla in my face to make me feel better, I will scream. And for the last time: "NO, I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO MAKE TACOS." I do know how to buy them from the store. I didn't even know what tacos were until I saw a Taco Belle in high school.

WHY ARE THERE A BILLION CHINESE KOSHER RESTAURANTS? HOW MANY CHINESE JEWS DO YOU KNOW? Sorry, I just needed to get that off my chest. This Jewish obsession with sushi has to stop...or at least pause while someone contemplates what would be a perfect addition to Washington Heights: a Dominican kosher restaurant!

In the meantime, a reader suggested I soothe my beastly Id by playing “Ta’am Latino: The Latin American Shabbat.” Who knew Lecha Dodi could go “ranchera”? Listen here. The CD is also available on Amazon

Searching for the promised land

This video on followers of Judaism in Uganda is quick to point out that these people are not the Falasha, the Ethiopian Jews whose claim to Jewish ancestry has given them the opportunity to utilize the Law of Return. They have come to Judaism despite the lack of Jewish ancestry and have become fiercely drawn to Judaism and Israel.

Hat tip for this video: Daas Torah.

"Freshly-ordained Ugandan rabbi gets ball rolling on returning home", an article last year in The Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles, spotlighted Rabbi Gershom Sizomu, the African-born Chief Rabbi of Uganda who received ordination from an American rabbinical school, the Ziegler School of Rabbinic Studies, and performed 250 Conservative conversions in Uganda in July 2008.

The JTA article, "Abayudaya Jews deliver relief to famine-plagued Ugandans" (8/2/09) offers a more recent look at the Ugandan community. And Kulanu ("All of Us" in Hebrew), founded in 1994, a non-profit organization which helps isolated Jewish communities around the world has coordinated with the Abayudayan community for a Fall 2009 Kulanu-Abayudayan Speaking Tour.

Jews in the News Roundup

I don't necessarily agree with all of these articles but they definitely caught my eye this past week. 

"Gay vs. Orthodox: A Deadly Turn in Israel’s Culture War? (Time)

This article points the finger at the ultra-Orthodox segment in Israel for the attack on a local gay youth club.

"The Intermarriage Dividend"

This article uses statistics to show that intermarriage really isn’t a “disaster.” You be the judge.

"The ‘Who is a Jew’ saga, UK version (JPost)"

Is Judaism a race or a religion? The UK brawl over “Who is a Jew” continues.

“Catholics recall Jewish ancestry at Denver conference” (Denver Post)"

Some Catholics are embracing their Jewish heritage while others are finding it problematic.

“’You can’t allow the nation to be divided’-An Interview with Chief Rabbi Shlomo Amar” (Jewish Press)"

An interview with the man who decided Israel doesn’t accept diaspora Orthodox conversions ‘carte blanche.’

“A Cultural Struggle Where Hate is the Enemy” (New Jersey Jewish News)

The haredi (ultra-Orthodox) can’t catch a break in the news this week. Here’s more fuel to that fire.

“Russian Jews defy Israeli rabbi’s ban on marriage” (The National)

A symbolic public wedding ceremony is held by Russian couple who cannot legally marry in Israel.

“The Remarkable Journey from Intermarried to Torah-True Home” (5 Towns Jewish Times)

Okay, the story’s a little cheesy but it defies the old fairytale about non-Jewish women stealing “our Jewish men.” Here’s another tale of a non-Jewish woman dragging her Jewish husband (kicking and screaming) back to Judaism.

“Black Like Me” (Haaretz)

The Ethiopian woman, whose conversion was annulled amidst a trial that pitted her against the yeshiva student who ran her over in a parking lot, finally speaks out.

“Restoring their heritage” (OA Online)

Controversy arises over “Certificate of Return” being issued to Anusim without a conversion process.

“ACLU Challengees Georgia’s Kosher Laws” (Washington Post)

The ACLU filed a lawsuit challenging a Georgia law that mandates all foods sold as kosher adhere to Orthodox religious rules and requirements.

"The Long Shadow of Scandal: Now and Then" (The Forward)

Historian Jonathan D. Sarna looks back at a history of Jews making headlines for criminal behavior.

"U.K.'s Jewish-School Ruling: Who Decides Who Is a Jew?" (Time)

Does anyone else feel like Time magazine reports Jewish news, like, two months too late? Did they really just hear about this case? Anyway, this article is very to the point.

"First Hispanic? Just for Yourself" (Jewish Week)

Yes, those crazy Jews are at it again trying to prove that Benjamin Cardozo was Hispanic and therefore the first Hispanic Supreme Court Justice. How about letting the Hispanic community decide who is a part of the club and who isn't? After all, if the article preceding this is any prove Jews don't like it very much when others try to decide who is Jewish for them!

Benjamin Cardozo is not Hispanic

Here is an op-ed piece I had hoped to publish a couple of months back when the "Benjamin Cardozo is Hispanic" craze really started.

Before I’d even heard Sonia Sotomayor was picked as the first Hispanic Supreme Court Justice nominee, I received an email from Jewish friends saying she was not. According to them, Benjamin Cardozo, a Jew, was the first Hispanic Supreme Court Justice. Half-asleep and wide-eyed I clicked on the attached link about Cardozo and found he was Portuguese by way of New York, the Netherlands and England. I reread the information twice to see if I was missing something.

The term “Hispanic” includes Spaniards, Spanish-speakers across Latin America and those descended from either. Latino connotes being from Spanish-speaking Latin America and excludes Spaniards. As a Latina, these definitions are as simple and clear-cut to me as the notion the sky is blue and grass is green. But I had to look them up to prove this to my Jewish husband and friends who were angered these definitions did not include Portuguese from Brazil or Portugal. I couldn't make sense as to why I, a born and bred Latina, was trying to explain to a bunch of white Jews why someone wasn’t part of my people before I’d even had my morning coffee. Not that coffee would have helped.

I didn’t expect the attacks that ensued when I told them Cardozo was not Hispanic. They said my definitions were faulty. That Portuguese and Spanish folks are all “pretty much the same.” Pretty much the same? Really? Had the French and Italian also been made honorary Latinos the night before? Weren’t they “pretty much the same,” too?

One Jewish friend wrote that since all identities are social constructions, they are malleable and anyone could call themselves whatever they wanted, “so there’s no reason Cardozo can’t be Latino.” After having spent the entire day explaining why Cardozo wasn’t Hispanic to every Jewish friend who’d forwarded me articles about him, I huffed and puffed, writing back that I would whoop this friend’s ass if he repeated this nonsense to my face.

No matter how I explained things, I offended my Jewish friends. “Don’t you like Jews?” they asked. But no one thought twice about offending me. “Don’t you know what Hispanics are?” I might have asked. While it’s true the term Hispanic didn’t exist when Cardozo was alive, Cardozo identified primarily as a Jew and calling him Hispanic would be a stretch even under today’s definition. Would he have "self-identified" if the term had been available? We’ll never know. Even if he had, Portuguese-speakers are not considered Hispanic so the Hispanic community wouldn’t have taken him seriously as one of our own.

Even today, it's hard for people to grasp hyphenated identities. I often hear, "Hispanic and Jewish, say what? Black and Jewish, no way!" People are only recently coming to terms with people who have multiple identities thanks to the explosion of mixed-race, multicultural families and our current president, a product of this brave new world. It’s "cool" now to have multiple identities. I gather that’s why people are wondering what Cardozo would’ve called himself today. How cool would it have been if he’d represented two peoples in one shot? But the fact is, he didn’t and does not.

There is nothing “cool” about this media circus. It has left me dumbfounded and hurt. I feel betrayed by my Jewish brethren. Are they trying to steal something from my Latina side? On the whole, this has made me very uncomfortable. Every article about Cardozo is another attack—everyone from NPR to the NY Times weighed in! Every time people tell me the definition of a Hispanic could be/should be enlarged to include Cardozo, I feel myself grow smaller. When some Jewish friends finally conceded Cardozo did not fit the standard definition of Hispanic, they acted like they were doing me a favor because they did not want to hurt my feelings since I was obviously “really sensitive” about the subject.

So, nu, what if tomorrow morning non-Jews decided who is and who isn’t a Jew? Maybe the definition would now include people who “self-identify.” No conversion necessary, anyone who thinks they might be Jewish, anyone who feels they might be Jewish, can be Jewish. Why not? Would it trouble my Jewish friends that outsiders had gotten together behind their backs to decide who is or isn’t part of the Jewish people?

When I heard Sotomayor was nominated, I was excited because she wasn’t just the best nominee, she was a Latina. She had grown up in the projects and made it to the Ivy League, giving me hope that more young people in the Hispanic community could also “make it.” As a former NYC public high teacher, the first-generation child of Hispanic immigrants, seeing Sotomayor nominated made me feel like this country I have lived in all my life finally sees me.

But the moment my Jewish friends decided Cardozo was the first Hispanic Supreme Court Justice and Sotomayor wasn’t, I realized many people in this country still don’t. They don’t even trouble themselves to learn about my culture before deciding who my people are and are not. They’re too busy feeling insanely clever at having put one over on the Hispanic community and they never bothered to think twice whether they were hurting anyone in the process.

Good Hair, Bad Hair.

Someone forwarded me the new trailer for Chris Rock's "Good Hair" film which debuts in October. For the documentary, Rock takes us behind-the-scenes into the African-American hair industry. 

But this story will definitely appeal to Hispanic women like myself who grew up being told they had "pelo malo" (bad hair) that was only "good hair" when it was straightened (chemically or otherwise). In fact, a white Jewish woman told me that she had recently had her own curly hair relaxed so the appeal of this movie is far bigger than I could ever have imagined. 

Honoring Yourself, Children (But not Child Abusers)

As usual I am floored by the responses to my writing, especially the responses to my piece on Aish.com. Unfortunately, some more than others.

"David K , August 6, 2009: Easy for me to say but please try to love your mother. Any person with such mental illness needs love."

Right, uh, what? Why is it that someone can read that my mother held a knife to me and then tell me in the next breath to love her? I've been told even that I should "love my mother no matter what." I've even had people sit me down and tell me that mental illness alone cannot explain why a person would treat their children that way. When I got my first restraining order against my mother, a secretary at the police station asked what I had "done to deserve this."

Can you tell this is a touchy subject for me?

I think there are people who cannot fathom mothers and fathers who do not play nice with their children. They cannot imagine the children who have physically, mentally, emotionally and even sexually abused by their parents. Perhaps, the parents of these children who are suffering from mental illness DO deserve love but to ask the children they have abused to give it to them?

Does anyone realize what cold comfort the words "love your parents" provide to someone who has survived frequent abuse and neglect at the hands of their parents? Would you ask someone to "love" the person who has routinely brutally attacked them? No. Unless that person is their mother, apparently. No one asks me, for instance, to love the father who has only neglected me (but never beat me) my whole life.

Yeah, I guess it's time to recycle that post on honoring abusive parents.

Adios Querida? No, Adio Kerida

Scrambling for movies to watch this summer, someone suggested "Adio Kerida".

The documentary, produced and directed by anthropologist Ruth Behar, is about the search for identity and memory among Sephardic Jews with roots in Cuba. 

Cuba as you know is just a hop, skip and a jump from my parents' native Dominican Republic. Cuban food is similar enough in some ways (rice, beans, plantains) to Dominican food that I have lately found myself praying for a kosher Cuban restaurant. 

Maybe a kosher Dominican restaurant will never happen (unless I start one) but a kosher Cuban restaurant must exist somewhere. A friend who is going kosher said she will miss the non-kosher Cuban food most. She wrote me: "If I could just install a central line to get plantains into my body as quickly as possible, I'd be all over it."

The title of Ruth Behar's film is based on a Ladino song: 

Tu madre kuando te pario
I te kito al mundo
Korason eya no te dio
Para amar segundo
Adio, Adio kerida
No kero la vida
Me l'amargates tu
Va bushkate otro amor
Aharva otras puertas
Aspera otro pasion
Ke para mi sos muerta.

For the English translation click here.

This film is just another example of why you're missing out if you don't have The Jewish Channel. Now, if only I could get my husband to agree to getting cable. I guess I'll have to buy the film on DVD. 

One of the first books I read on my path to becoming Jewish was written by a Cuban Jew, Gigi Anders, by "Jubana!: The Awkwardly True and Dazzling Adventures of a Jewish Cubana Goddess". While Anders is not religious, I learned a lot about juggling Jewish and Hispanic cultures from her memoir.

All about Hair

Whoa, lots of posts about hair this week. If you enjoyed them, you can check out 51 other fun posts on hair by clicking on the "Hair" label at the bottom of this blog. Do you think I've got enough for a whole memoir on hair? It's an idea. It does seem like people are obsessed with hair whether they're covering, uncovering, losing it or...well, wearing someone else's. 

Meanwhile, over at Jew in the City, Allison Josephs is answering a question I've heard more than once before: "Isn't wearing a wig over hair kind of pointless?"

I used to go to AskMoses.com for those pesky questions but Jew in the City is much more fun!

Aliza Goes to Oxnard

My husband and I took a mini-trip up to Oxnard last week. I was not too happy about it. I mean, does Oxnard sound like an exciting place to you? I can’t think of an uglier name for a place right now.

Worst of all, when we got there, we discovered our phones didn’t work. Suddenly, I was in a world without Twitter, Facebook, my blog...a crazy, crazy world! Good thing I hadn’t brought my laptop or else I would have been really disappointed. Some people thought being sucked into this technological black hole would lead to more bonding experiences but I can’t tell you how many Law & Order episodes I watched while everyone else went to “happy hour.”

My favorite things about staying in the hotel in Oxnard:

1. The Sharp flat-screen TVs
2. HBO on said TV
3. My Kindle had Internet access on the beach
4. The giant comfy bed
5. Visiting the Walmart nearby

Everyone else's favorite things:

1. The  beach

2. The bicycling

3. Happy Hour

4. Happy Hour (I can't stress this one enough)

5. Bonding

Things I Wish I'd done:

1. Visited the Chabad of Oxnard

2. Whale watching

3. Bicycling

4. Sailing on a yacht (in a pretend universe where I have money for these things)

5. Gotten up before 11am

Okay, obviously, I really need to take going to Oxnard more seriously next time around. But honestly, going to the beach in California takes some getting used to. It took me a while to realize that going to the beach here is to New Yorkers like going to Central Park. People go to the beach here just to hang out. Most of the time, they don’t even get in the water because it’s too cold. In fact, sometimes it’s pretty windy at the beach too (it definitely was in Oxnard).

In New York, I only went to the beach (Brighton Beach) on the stickiest, hottest most sweltering disgusting days in the summer when there was absolutely nothing you wanted to do more than chuck yourself in the brisk Atlantic Ocean. I have yet to stick my toes in the Pacific though I have big plans to do so. Every time I go to the beach though, I can’t help wishing I was in the Dominican Republic where the water’s warm, the people are even warmer and the beaches are “perfect.”

The best part of the trip to Oxnard was going to the restaurant, Baron Herzog where we took a tour of the winery after having the most delicious meal. I could have had the most fancy, unpronounceable foods but instead, I had a big, hearty juicy burger. The best part was dessert when I had the most exquisite parve flan. In an instant, I was thrown back to those happy times in my childhood when my sister and I would make flan together instead of trying to beat each other unconscious.

Weirdest part of the trip to Oxnard? Someone noticed me at the restaurant! A nice, Jewish gentleman came over to tell me he had enjoyed my article in the Jewish Journal of Los Angeles last week. My family has decided this means I’m “famous.” Let’s hope that’s a good thing.

Reprint: Thoughts on Race and Gates

If you couldn't get enough of my piece in last week's Jewish Journal, then you can see it again at the Tolerant Nation blog "Thoughts on Race and Gates" and on Jewlicious.

In case you don't have the Jewish Journal in front of you, here are the Letters they received in response to my piece last week. One reader says she "shares in [my] pain and frustration" and offers that "bigotry for [Jews] is stupid." The second reader swears "New York Jews are far more racist than Los Angeles Jews" and invites me over for an "inter-racial Shabbaton."

Let me know what you think.

The kosher version of "Bagels and Locks"

Yeah, it's the kosher and uncircumcised version of "Bagels and Locks" at Chabad.org, my mini-memoir on my love/hate relationship with my hair. Even if you've read alternative versions at shorter lengths, you'll get a kick out of this one. 

I do not live in a racist community

Whew, I need to get this off my chest.

I have some bad news, folks. I do not live in a racist community. I live in a racist world. I spent a great deal of time in New York City and Los Angeles and I wouldn’t call either of the Jewish communities I live in while I’m there racist. In fact, I have found the Los Angeles, Riverdale, Upper East Side and Washington Heights Jewish communities especially welcoming.

So you can imagine how saddened and shocked I am when someone in these communities has opened their mouth and rather unexpectedly said something awful. No matter how many times I hear something awful being said, it doesn't become any less shocking. Every time it makes me want to curl up as I die a slow painful death.

No, I wouldn’t call the Jewish community anymore racist than the Dominican community I grew up in. I would never call an entire community 100% racist because that would be generalizing. How could I be Jewish if I believed that all Jews were racist? How could I be Jewish if I let these bad experiences taint my feelings towards an entire people? But for many people, it takes just one cruel word to push them away from the Jewish community and so I am trying to prevent people from uttering them, I am trying to make them more aware of choosing their words more wisely.

Would I call most of the people who have hurt me by making racist statements virulent racists? No, they are not the type of white supremacists to shoot up Holocaust museums. They are not the type to discriminate against hiring someone because they are a person of color. They are even the type who do have friends who are people of color but in spite of this hold on to stupid prejudices. When Obama became president, I thought someone put it well when they said this would be the end of “overt” racism but subtle racism still exists. People have their prejudices and their stereotypes and for some reason, I end up smack dab in the middle of them all too often.

For every story I’ve heard about a person of color experiencing racism (or some other form of discrimination) in the Jewish community, I’ve heard a story where a person of color has been embraced with no questions asked. But one does not cancel out the other. And for every letter I have received that said “That is my story! I, too, have experienced racism!,” I received letters (rather lengthy ones) from people saying that this was not their experience and that they convinced themselves that my experiences were somehow invalid or confused.

We cannot rid ourselves of racism by pretending that it doesn’t exist. We cannot rid ourselves of the problems the Jewish community and the broader community faces by sweeping things under the rug. And as a writer, I would be the last one to hold to the notion that one must be silent rather than air a community’s dirty laundry. Because as a writer, I am aware how mighty the pen can be over the sword. Writing can cause change.

In the same week, I published two stories: one about the racism I have experienced in the Jewish community and the other about how the Jewish community has embraced me…and even my non-Jewish family. But you can guess which one I’ve gotten the most comments on.

Hilarious New Blog to Follow!

On a day-to-day basis, I am ALWAYS behind on my reading. I’m inundated by news articles, magazines, newsletters so it’s hard to keep up with blogs. Thankfully, Twitter followers also tip me off when there’s something I just HAVE TO read.

@MaNishtana is new to Twittering and blogging he’s making quite a splash. The self-described “Black. Jewish. 100% both. Ffb. 5th generation. Im like a unicorn mixed with a dragon. That can whistle. Black jews are the new black” is always Tweeting something interesting and blogging something hilarious.

Notable posts to check out:

In “Urban Parsha,” MaNishtana turns the weekly Torah portion on it’s head by making it “just like regular Torah, but ghetto.” If you can understand the lingo, then you’ll be laughing right out of your seat. If you’ve got no sense of humor, you’ll find it too hot to handle.

In “An Open-So-called Letter,” MaNishtana addresses Hebrew-Israelites in a scathing letter about their effect on black Jews. He wants to know when G-d ordered them to “dress in a manner as if thou art the bastard offspring of a threesome between the power rangers, the village people, and lawrence of arabia.” I can’t help thinking I never want to get on this guy’s bad side.

I honestly didn't realize how ghetto I was until I read his Urban Parsha. I only had to look up one word. G-d bless Urban Dictionary.

Thanks but no thanks!

This comment from "Naomi" deserves its own post:

While walking to work from the subway, a gentleman with little green books said, "Would you like a copy of the New Testament?" Without pausing, I said "No thanks, I have the old one."

Naomi is full of words of wisdom!

Even better: I have a Jewish coworker who has moved away from all observance (though his parents are observant and I think he still lives at home - he's just graduated college). Because I was out the first two days and the last two days of Pesach, my Catholic coworker said, "Heck, we should all convert to Judaism!" (to get the days off, of course). My Jewish coworker agreed. I said to him "You don't have to convert! It's your religion!"

What Not to Wear: Mayim Bialik

Mayim Bialik (better known as 1990's TV character Blossom Russo) tells Tablet Magazine about her "Wardrobe" and how it reflects her beliefs.

Orthodox and Unattached

When I was 25 and I decided to become an Orthodox Jew, people whispered to me that I might be "too old" to ever find a nice Jewish husband. Now, at 29, surrounded by single Orthodox Jewish friends of the same age and married Orthodox friends with broods of two or three kids, I also find myself in a weird position. But my single friends stress to me, "At least you're married." 

A clip from "Unattached" below and "Hard to Match" looks at the so-called "Shidduch Crisis" or "Singles Crisis" in the Orthodox Jewish community.

Happy Tu B'av

I don't have much to say about Tu B'av, the date on the Jewish calendar that some have liked to the Jewish Valentine's Day.

But boy, does my friend and fellow blogger MixedJewGirl have a lot to say about this little holiday. She's written "An Open Letter to G-d on Tu B'Av" and I'm really hoping G-d is listening. 

Ladino Rocks!

As usual, my Ladino is great, my Hebrew is not. Do you think Ladino will make a comeback? Let's hope so.

Watch these kiddies singing this beautiful Ladino folk song. Check out the lyrics below.

Durme, durme hijiko de madre,
Durme, durme s’in ansio y dolor;
Sienti joya palavrikas de tu madre.
Las palavras di Shema Yisrael
Durme, durme hijiko de madre,
Con hermozura de Shema Yisrael.

And in English.

Obama & the Israelis

Dealing with folks who are unable to discuss Obama without resorting to the n-word, much less calling him "Muslim" (like it's a dirty word) is, well, rather tiresome. Because if you're going to criticize Obama, you got to do it right. And that's exactly what Aluf Benn does in "Why Won’t Obama Talk to Israel?"

What the...?

I don't even know what to say.

Oh, the wonders of Limmud LA (and a rather long blog)

Two years ago, my husband’s parents dragged out to Los Angeles in February for a 3-day Jewish conference. Like the smart and frostbitten New Yorkers were, we accepted without knowing very much about the conference itself. Because it was a volunteer-run conference, we signed up to teach a session or two about Jewish topics we were interested in and thought we could impart some wisdom about.

The conference, Limmud LA 2008 was more than incredible. It was a networking opportunity: exposing me to Jews of all different stripes from diverse backgrounds. It was a learning opportunity: I spent the entire three days powering through sessions on everything from sexuality to martial arts (all from the Jewish perspective), pushing my body to its limits because I didn’t want to miss a thing. The only bad thing about Limmud LA was that there was always a session going on you felt guilty about missing. (Incidentally, I missed Limmud LA 2009 but I did make it out to Limmud NY 2009.)

When I got an email that there would be a “Taste of Limmud” event in the Los Angeles neighborhood where my husband is doing a summer internship, I didn’t hesitate to sign up. For two hours, I would get just a taste, a little bite to whet my appetite for Limmud LA 2010. I knew that it would leave me thirsty for more and it did.

When I arrived, I didn’t recognize a single face and I was already in a lot of pain so I wasn’t excited to network or chat up strangers. Instead, I plopped down into a folding chair in the spacious new house of a fellow Limmud junkie who was hosting the event and I read and reread the handout explaining the sessions I would get to choose from.

For Session One (8:00-8:20pm), I had a choice between “Torah, Shame and the Oven of Akhnai: One of the Wildest and Most Controversial Stories in the Talmud” led by David Suissa, a columnist for The Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles, or “Shabbat: The Jewish Formula for Health Prevention” led by Cathie Ann Lippman, a doctor who has been practicing environmental and preventative medicine in Beverly Hills for almost 30 years.

I had just written a piece on Shabbat so it was on my mind but I figured I'd push myself in a direction I normally wouldn’t go in (Limmud gives you a lot of room for growing in interesting directions) so I chose the Talmud session. Plus, as far as Jewish geography went, I was only one degree away from David Suissa and I figured I’d support a family friend. The thing is that just the idea of learning Talmud makes me start dozing off.

Suissa was very enthusiastic but how could anyone teach Talmud in 20 minutes?! (Actual sessions at the conference are much longer.) When he said he wasn’t your regular Talmud lover, he got my immediate attention. I laughed when he likened the Talmud to the fine print you have to read before you sign a contract—“too intricate for some” but obviously, “a drug” for others. Talmud is my husband's drug of choice.

As Suissa tried to explain all the back and forth between the rabbis on the story he was trying to tell us, I quickly got lost. But the overall message of his session stuck with me: Judaism “puts so high a premium on the words you use” that when you “wrong someone with words, G-d is the only person who can forgive you” because you can never take the words back, it made me think deeply about how conscious I need to be and should be as a writer and as an everyday chatterbox.

For Session Two (8:30pm-8:50pm), I had a choice between “Celebration and Mourning: The Cycle of Life” with Cedar Sinai Hospital chaplain Rabbi Jason Weiner or “Biblical Bad Boyz: King David’s Night Out” with Marcus Freed. Going against type again, I went with the former over the latter even though the second sounded like I was going to get the Jewish version of a Spanish telenovela (juicy!) and the first sounded very heavy…did I really want to deal with “profound life lessons at 8:30pm? Apparently, I did.

Off the bat, the-so-young-looking-he-gets-asked-about-his-age-all-the-time-at-work Weiner didn’t exude Suissa’s easy confidence but then he was attempting to “talk about end of life things without being too depressing,” a goal possibly as impossible as squeezing Talmud into 20 minutes.

Weiner’s session was more interactive than Suissa’s, he seemed more like a facilitator than the leader. He got a lot of people in the audience to share some heavy stuff on their views of G-d’s participation in the world. Soundbites: “A festival is when we recognize G-d is in the world.” “Sometimes a bad thing is a wake-up call.” “At our saddest moments, we see the hand of G-d.” 20 minutes to go deep? Done. His heartrending story about a couple holding their wedding ceremony in a hospital room so Grandpa wouldn’t miss it will stay with me.

And now if you’re curious at Limmud LA and you’re in Los Angeles, check out the “Make Your Own Sunday” event coming up next week. If you’re not in LA, check out "Limmud International" to find the Limmud nearest you.